Auckland International Airport
…to stand in exactly the spot where I stood 4 months ago/ yesterday/ a lifetime ago, and be overcome by memory of what that felt like - 6 am, pissing rain, freezing cold, and the realization that I was really Doing This, that I was half a world away and there was no turning back… and here and now, with so many people and places inside me, so much felt, smelled, tasted, seen, endured, and reveled in; now I stand here again and contemplate my return. powerful. I Did It! SF I am back. Surreal. It’s cold. 4 continuous days of transit has brought me here, into the warm fold of friendship and familiarity. I don’t know what’s next, but I’m here, and I will bring a different, changed self to this place, and See What Comes. This journey began with 2 significant deaths - that of my 20 year life partnership & marriage, and that of my beautiful brother Geoffrey. Seems not only does Nature abhor a vacuum, but she’s also pretty fond of bookends - the trip ending, as it has, with the death of Bowie and my 14 yr old husky-shepherd-chow Uma… I have muttered that I am really sick to death of death, but that means life, too, it’s all the same circle, so I take it back and try to breathe more space into my heart. I have returned to SF having met many challenges, felt my heart open in clunky, uneven shifts, like a calving glacier, and done some real healing around the losses of the past few years. New Zealand gave me untold levels of wonder at the natural world, many precious friendships, and crazy strong legs. Indonesia gave me still more beauty, a lot of laughter & good food, new friends and old friendship rekindled, …and way too many of sarongs! From Thailand - lasting inspiration, contact with my Natural Self, & an intense lens on the deep, old patterns I’ve held within for too long. Sri Lanka gave me stupendous beauty, surf, once-in-a-lifetime thrills and soul wonder, burning red grit-scratched eyeballs, the best food ever, and a cute Sri Lankan boyfriend. Not a bad haul… :))))) I can only hope I gave back also. Many thanks to those from home who stayed in touch, who commented through Facebook, and reminded me that I was never really alone. A thousand bows to the nuns & monks of Wat Suan Mokh for teaching me that grace is possible and human beings can actually be that beautiful. Thanks to all the friends I made along the way, who saw past age and who laughed at my jokes. Thanks to Dinesh, for giving me entree into a Sri Lanka I would otherwise never have discovered. Well, I guess that’s all then… still waiting for the book deal with movie option… ha ha ha…
1 Comment
Paula
2/10/2016 09:20:40 am
A beautiful ending to a beautiful travelogue, thank you so much Shannon. Thanks for taking us along. In the photo outside the temple you look so open and young and enthusiastic like a child. Reborn. Congratulations for your bravery. Welcome back. <3
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